I believe that we are on the threshold of needing to be reminded of what it
means to adore him, to obey him, and to trust him with all that we are,
"for our ALL to be on the alter" (Genesis 22:8-13) for God to bridge the gap and `heal
or broken land!
This week God spoke to Jason and I about the journey we have been on for the last 6 years. As he has brought us out of our Exodus we have spent several years making our way through the desert. We needed this time to grow, to trust God more, to get our roles as husband and wife figured out according to God's plan for us instead of the worlds. In the midst of all of this we have also been busy just living, getting through the day to day, so to speak! I would be lying if I told you it has been easy..... It hasn't but it has been rewarding! I have seen the hand of God more than once, show up in times where there was nothing left to do but pray and believe God for the difference.
Our church is in the middle of a 40 day bible study.
We do this each year as the year kicks off in hopes of growing closer to God as
a church body, as we strive to press into him more. Our study this year
is surrounding the book by Mark Batterson "The Circle Maker".
Let me just say I love this book. I already believed many of the things
written in the pages of this book, but I needed to be reminded of fact that God
hasn't given up on us. He is calling many of us according to the same
purpose.
His word says that, "he is no respecter of persons" (1 Peter 1:17). He loves
us each equally...... sometimes the difference in the outcomes is the ability
of us as Christians to stand in the gap and believe God for the MIRACLE we are
asking for. About 1 1/2 years ago I went through a really rough place
with God trying to understand why we (as a family) were still wandering in the dessert.
I really wanted to get into our Promise Land. That place that God was
preparing us for. That place that he had given me visions of and allowed me to
dream about. I couldn't understand why we weren't making the cut.
What had we missed in the journey that was keeping us from all that God had for
us. It was in the next few months that God taught me how to just
rest! Simply put, I was so busy praying in miracles and standing in the
gap in so many areas within my family, that I wasn't able to just stop and wait
upon the Lord, I always felt like I needed to be working on the next
step. It took me about a year to learn how to really wait upon
him. I can honestly say it was a lesson worth learning! I needed
the rest. I needed to learn how to let God carry me even in the good
times, in the times when my world isn't falling apart.
I kept going back to the story of the Israelisetes in the desert and comparing myself to them trying to figure out why we were still in the desert.
Check list of things not to do
Make a golden calf - check
Complain and whine when we don't like what we are blessed with - check
Expect miracles from God and then question his decision making- check
Expect someone else to hear from God for me- check
Avoid the promise because of fear- check (just wanted you to know I had already done this several years ago, so I am so over it by now!)
The answer came just 4 short days ago..........
In the Circle Maker, Mark Batterson talks about the fact that there was not 1 person in the first generation of Israelite's that was alive to walk into the Promise Land....... I have read this hundreds of times in fact in the last 2 years I have read it at least 2-3 times per month. However I couldn't see what was right in front of me! Only the second generation and their children were allowed to enter! When God had delivered us from our Egypt he had also delivered us from the bondage of the past, but we had failed to let go of our former selves totally and walk upright in our new selves (2nd generation). I was still punishing myself for things in my life that were totally out of my control; things from my childhood that I did not cause, but survived! WOW!! I think it has been the most freeing feeling I have ever felt! I know I have said it before, but I will stand by this statement as each time God draws me closer to him and I step further from my Egypt.
In the last 4 days I have began to dream about our Promise Land again. I can almost smell the sweetness of it's fruit. The path is becoming more clear...... Plan to read part III on Friday!
