Are you an Encourager or a Discourager

I met with a dear friend this week and was reminded as we prayed together for our spouses that we have the ability to be encouraging to our mate or to be discouraging.

Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand.

                                                                                      Matthew 12:25 (NIV)

I stopped for a minute to question.  Am I an encourager or a discourager?  Do I show Jason that I believe in him?  Does he know that I stand behind his decisions?  God brought three scriptures to my mind.  The first had to do with how I talk about my spouse!!! Ladies this is crucial.  How we speak about our husband relays to people around us what we feel consciously and unconsciously.   

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

                                                                                        Ephesians 4;29 (NIV)
Even more serious than that is the fact the spoke word is used in the war in the heaven-lies.  we can either use our words to give power to the demons or to the angels.

The tongue has the power of life and death,
    and those who love it will eat its fruit. 

                                               Proverbs 18:21 (NIV)

We are called to stand beside our men.  To go into our prayer closets and to intercede on behalf of our families to go to God in times of distress and to put our all on the alter so to speak.  Now don't get me wrong I am not saying we need to be door mats.  I am simply saying that if you cannot come to a common ground in a decision with your spouse you need to take it to the Lord in prayer.  

 

The husband is the head and so as wives we are called to submit to that authority.   There was a time in our marriage when I would have fought Jason to get my way, where I might have even pouted about the decision that was made, even if I got my way.  But that day has passed.  As I said earlier in today's blog I still check myself to be sure I am sensitive to God's leading in this area. I am a strong personality and always want to be sure I am submitting without reservation!  We can go to our prayer closets as a part of that submission and ask God to help us to be of one mind in this decision as we should be.  God will change you or him or maybe both of you.  Either way it will be a winning situation because if we go with God we cannot fail!

Go with God,

Rechelle